25 December 2005

Update

I had a magnificent Christmas. I enjoyed the day with my family and I feel peace and goodwill.

Tomorrow I am off on a road trip to Broken Hill. I am looking forward to the time out and the adventure. I hope we will have a very interesting and enjoyable time. I want to get lots of good photo's, enjoy writing and find the time to contemplate my life and my future as well as appreciate all I have in my life. I am confident I will do that.

23 December 2005

Festive

Man boy who lives with me has bought himself a unicycle. I don't think it has anything to do with Christmas but it could be his way of playing Santa to himself.
One of the real children in the family is working in a cafe being harrassed and abused and reduced to tears.
I am in a daze, wondering if I am prepared and trying to gather up the energy and joy to go with the season.
Other child is sleeping most of the time, only breaking to eat or talk on the phone.

Next week this season will be done.

21 December 2005

Cell

I wish I had a dollar for every time the word cell was in the newspaper. There are so many of them, stem cells, terrorist cells, storm cells, jail cells and cancer cells. Most of them don't sound very good. I wonder why the word is used so often.

16 December 2005

Holidays

Here at last. The tension has drained and thoughts about school have all but left me. So many possibilities lie in the coming weeks. To do lists are written, Christmas celebrations with family, (one of my brothers is returning from NT), naps, reading, cleaning, writing. I love the holidays. Especially these long ones give me the opportunity to become myself again and explore. I am grateful for my life.

10 December 2005

December - woot!

An amazing week has wooshed by.

The last week of students at school is my favourite week. Not just because it is closer to the holidays, but hey, I am human. We have such a fun time reflecting on the year and by this stage the students are so close and know each other so well. It is a great celebration. Last year I didn't have a homeroom. I just taught subjects and I missed it so much.

Yesterday we farewelled the year 9s from my school and there were tears. I love how we let them go. My son is in year 9 and he got the chance to show a short film he had made in Enterprise to the school. It was well received. I was already proud of him and I enjoyed seeing others acknowledge and celebrate his effors.

Tomorrow my daughter turns 17. I am so proud of her. She is an amazing young woman. I have adored her since the moment I saw her.

What a month this is!

05 December 2005

The Upside of Anger

I really enjoyed this movie. I strongly identified with the main character. Not that my husband died and I thought he'd left me for another woman, but I have been equally outraged about wrong assumptions and she was just playing it out to an extreme scenario. She was angry and wrong and hurt and wrong and fabulously self indulgent and witty and wrong. I have been all those things before and it really made me think to watch someone else do it in such a spectacular way.

My wonderful fairy godmother Auntie Angela said to me once that the great thing in life is that she is so often wrong. Most of the hurts and pains and negative things we imagine are wrong. It would be great if I could keep that in mind in future. When you are hurt or imagining some betrayal or slight, it is very difficult to suppose you could be wrong. I intend to do that though. That is my intention.

03 December 2005

My 40th Birthday

I am 40. My wonderful family and friends celebrated a washed out party with me last night. I enjoyed seeing all the people I love and enjoying their company.
I don't feel different.
I feel the same way I have always felt.
I appreciate my family and friends and all the great things I have in my life. I feel blessed.